Bam. There you go.
Let Go and Move On
“Why are you wearing the suit, Kuroba?” Conan raised an eyebrow as his friend took a seat beside him, letting his legs dangle over the side of the building.
Kaito shrugged. “I’m feeling nostalgic and thought that one last time couldn’t hurt. If anyone happens to stumble upon us up here, we can just say I’m an avid cosplayer mourning the death of my idol.”
Shaking his head, Conan handed his rival one of the ice cream cones he’d been holding. “One scoop chocolate fudge, one scoop rocky road, and one scoop turtle. Right?”
“Have I ever told you how much I love you, Tantei-kun?” Kaito snickered, mussing the smaller boy’s hair as he took the sweet treat.
Shinichi bristled, scrunching up his nose. “Yes. Yes, you have. Many times. Have I ever told you how much I want you to stop?”
“Just as often.” Kaito smirked…but then his cheeky grin mellowed and slowly faded into a subdued, slightly melancholy expression. “But in all seriousness, Kudo, thanks for the ice cream. I really needed this.”
“What’s up?” Shinichi gave Kaito a quick once over. The magician did seem a little down, and he wasn’t trying to cover it up with his poker face like he normally did.
Kaito just shook his head. “Fireworks are about to start,” he replied and then took a bite of his ice cream, putting an end to further conversation.
And the show did start, lighting up the steamy August evening with a blaze of colors. The crackles and pops drowned out the howls of the cicadas as the explosions of light outshone the stars.
They sat in silent awe as the display reminded each of his own childhood—bickering with Ran until the sky lit up, making them both forget their quarrel in their amazement…sitting on his father’s lap just days before his death, licking at a popsicle that had turned his entire mouth blue as the fireworks exploded above them.
Shinichi happened to glance at Kaito about halfway through and noticed that tears were quietly streaming down the other boy’s face, even as Kaito wore a bittersweet smile.
“Kuroba?” he called softly, tentatively reaching out and letting a hand rest on Kaito’s arm.
Kaito gave a start.
Shinichi retracted. “S-Sorry. I… What’s wrong?”
Kaito shook his head once more. “It’s stupid. I mean…” He smiled in self-reproof. “It’s all over, right? It’s… It’s gone?”
Shinichi blinked, but then quickly caught on. “Pandora? Yeah. Yeah. It’s gone. Ground up into a fine powder and scattered in several locations. It’s over.”
Kaito nodded. “Right. It’s over. I…fulfilled my dad’s mission, and now Kid’s dead and…and I can just go back to…” His voice cracked, and the tears flowed freely. He shook his head. “Go back to what exactly, I wonder? I’ve…the past four years, I’ve…and it’s not like Aoko’s still waiting around for me. I just know that stupid Okubo boyfriend of hers is going to propose, and…besides…our relationship isn’t what it used to be. I’m not the guy that she loved anymore, so…”
“Yeah,” Shinichi sighed. “Believe me, I understand…. After four years as Conan, there is nowhere to go home to anymore. This is my reality, and…I just have to live with it.”
“It’s a little different for me,” Kaito mumbled, and it was barely audible over the exploding fireworks. “Kid is dead now. I have to put that part of my life behind me, so I have to move on and make a new life for myself. It’s just…Kid is an important part of me. I don’t know how not to be Kid. I’m gonna miss it.”
He smiled, feeling silly as he wiped at the barrage of tears that just wouldn’t stop. “Sorry. I’m sentimental, and…being Kid…it made me feel close, connected to my dad, so…even though my mission is over now and I have no way to justify being Kid anymore…I still don’t want to give it up because—” His voice broke again, and he closed his eyes, taking a moment to compose himself. “I don’t want to lose my dad all over again,” he whispered.
Shinichi rested his palm reassuringly on Kaito’s shoulder, giving it a comforting pat from time to time so that Kaito would know he was there for him. He remained silent for a good while, though, just letting his friend cry it out.
“Sorry,” Kaito whispered a few minutes later just as the fireworks finale was coming to a head. “I feel really ridiculous because I’m relieved and I’m happy that this is all over and that I can just be a regular person again. I mean, this has seriously screwed up my life, my relationships, but…at the same time…I don’t want it to end. I don’t want to be normal, and I’m going to miss this. Even though it was dangerous and emotionally taxing, I did enjoy it. I had fun being Kid, so…”
He shook his head once more, smiling bashfully. “I’m all mixed up.”
“You know,” Shinichi broached the subject gently. “It doesn’t all have to be over just because you can’t go out and steal jewels in a white tuxedo anymore. Sure, you completed your father’s mission of destroying Pandora, but…there’s still the Black Organization out there. You’ve foiled their plot, but you haven’t taken them out of play yet.”
Kaito’s eyes widened. He had always wanted to put those murderers behind bars, get justice, but…
“As you know, I’m kind of working with the FBI, CIA, and Secret Police to take them down. If you like, we could always use your skills on our team. I’m sure the others would be glad to have you once you show them what you can do. You’d be a valuable addition, Kuroba…if you’re up to it.”
“You’d really let me join your crew?” Kaito’s heart skipped a beat in exhilaration.
Shinichi grinned. “Oh yeah. Most definitely…. What do you say?”
“I think my dad would be proud if I took his mission a step further and put those slimewads out of business.” Kaito positively beamed, brighter than any of the stars or the fireworks in the background.
The
End