Post by doctorpeggy on Nov 23, 2020 19:24:09 GMT
Prompt:Write a story in which the reader cannot see inside the mind of any of the characters. Express the thoughts and feelings of the characters only through dialogue, action, and physical description.
This is a short one. This is a scene I've tried writing a few times before. I kind of wanted Ran to be a little more stubborn and angry, because she totally deserves to be, but I also wanted to make the characters act a little more like they might in canon, where Ran usually melts as soon as Shinichi says something either smooth or sincere (please note that I don't necessarily know how to write someone being smooth and that might be a little apparent).
Summary: Shinichi finally comes clean.
The Final Truth
Ran’s eyebrows, the corners of her lips, the bridge of her nose, the spaces above her eyelids, are all creased. Tears catch in the wrinkles of her expression. Her fists are clenched by her sides.
“You could have trusted me,” she spits.
Shinichi’s face is expressionless in comparison, eyebrows set low but eyes sharp and dry, lips pressed together lightly, but the corners not pinched. His chin is tilted down just a little more than usual, but his shoulders are broad and his hands are in his pockets.
“It wasn’t not about trusting you,” he argues evenly, “it’s them I didn’t trust.”
Ran steps back, turning away from him just a little.
“Why are you telling me all this now?” she demands softly, “If you never told me I would never know. I’d just keep on loving you.”
Shinichi’s chin dips a little more.
“The truth needed to be said. I couldn’t tell you before, for your own safety, but there is only ever one truth, and it wasn’t right to keep it from you when I didn’t need to.”
Ran turns back to him, eyes wide and dark and violent, eyebrows drawn close.
“Why do you always say that?” she snaps, “Is the truth that much more important than my feelings? Is that what it is? I guess you’re a detective first and a human being second, aren’t you?”
Shinichi lifts his head up a little, looking Ran in the eye, unflinching despite her glare.
“Would you rather that I didn’t tell you?”
“I don’t know, all I know is that I’m just so tired of your stupid detective game. The truth always comes first, doesn’t it? You don’t care if the truths ends our entire relationship!”
Tears flow down her cheeks, down her chin, down her neck. Shinichi does not waver.
“I trusted that our love was enough to withstand the truth,” he says calmly.
For a moment Ran is stunned, eyes going wide and bright, lips and cheeks and nose turning pink.
“You—” Ran sputters, shaking her head, “you always say these… these romantic things like they fix everything…”
She swipes at the tears on her face, walking forward towards him, face down, until her forehead bumps lightly against his chest.
“Don’t they?” Shinichi asks, smiling gently.
“You always…” Ran sobs, as if not having heard Shinichi.
“I always?”
“You always make me like this. You just know I love you too much.”
Slowly, Shinichi wraps his arms around her.
“I’m sorry, Ran,” he whispers solemnly.
“I’m still mad at you,” she mumbles into his shirt, also slipping her arms around his torso.
“I know,” he breathes into her hair.
“I haven’t forgiven you yet.”
“I know.”
“I love you.”
“I know.”
“Shinichi!”
“Alright, alright, I love you too."
This is a short one. This is a scene I've tried writing a few times before. I kind of wanted Ran to be a little more stubborn and angry, because she totally deserves to be, but I also wanted to make the characters act a little more like they might in canon, where Ran usually melts as soon as Shinichi says something either smooth or sincere (please note that I don't necessarily know how to write someone being smooth and that might be a little apparent).
Summary: Shinichi finally comes clean.
The Final Truth
Ran’s eyebrows, the corners of her lips, the bridge of her nose, the spaces above her eyelids, are all creased. Tears catch in the wrinkles of her expression. Her fists are clenched by her sides.
“You could have trusted me,” she spits.
Shinichi’s face is expressionless in comparison, eyebrows set low but eyes sharp and dry, lips pressed together lightly, but the corners not pinched. His chin is tilted down just a little more than usual, but his shoulders are broad and his hands are in his pockets.
“It wasn’t not about trusting you,” he argues evenly, “it’s them I didn’t trust.”
Ran steps back, turning away from him just a little.
“Why are you telling me all this now?” she demands softly, “If you never told me I would never know. I’d just keep on loving you.”
Shinichi’s chin dips a little more.
“The truth needed to be said. I couldn’t tell you before, for your own safety, but there is only ever one truth, and it wasn’t right to keep it from you when I didn’t need to.”
Ran turns back to him, eyes wide and dark and violent, eyebrows drawn close.
“Why do you always say that?” she snaps, “Is the truth that much more important than my feelings? Is that what it is? I guess you’re a detective first and a human being second, aren’t you?”
Shinichi lifts his head up a little, looking Ran in the eye, unflinching despite her glare.
“Would you rather that I didn’t tell you?”
“I don’t know, all I know is that I’m just so tired of your stupid detective game. The truth always comes first, doesn’t it? You don’t care if the truths ends our entire relationship!”
Tears flow down her cheeks, down her chin, down her neck. Shinichi does not waver.
“I trusted that our love was enough to withstand the truth,” he says calmly.
For a moment Ran is stunned, eyes going wide and bright, lips and cheeks and nose turning pink.
“You—” Ran sputters, shaking her head, “you always say these… these romantic things like they fix everything…”
She swipes at the tears on her face, walking forward towards him, face down, until her forehead bumps lightly against his chest.
“Don’t they?” Shinichi asks, smiling gently.
“You always…” Ran sobs, as if not having heard Shinichi.
“I always?”
“You always make me like this. You just know I love you too much.”
Slowly, Shinichi wraps his arms around her.
“I’m sorry, Ran,” he whispers solemnly.
“I’m still mad at you,” she mumbles into his shirt, also slipping her arms around his torso.
“I know,” he breathes into her hair.
“I haven’t forgiven you yet.”
“I know.”
“I love you.”
“I know.”
“Shinichi!”
“Alright, alright, I love you too."