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Post by Mikauzoran on Apr 7, 2015 2:22:35 GMT
Sooo...tell me if this idea sounds stupid: Invaders come from another country and take over the capital city of the land, killing the king. The surviving prince flees to the south in search of the descendants of the hero of the legends. He finds her, and they set off to wake the guardians of the land in order to summon the forgotten goddess to expel the invaders. (Insert my usual style, humor, and craziness including some romance between Miss Hero and the prince.)
The Prince will probably end up like Haku-chan, and I expect my hero Mika will have touches of Kaito's impish personality, but I'm planning lots of world building here. There are five distinct "lands" within the country corresponding with the five elements. The people of the sea, Mika's people, are descended from the merfolk; the metal people of the caves are a metallic, shadowy race; the people of the forest are foliage-y; and the fire people have slight...pyromaniac tendencies. Haven't decided about the wind people yet. Probably birds of some kind. I plan on doing a lot of background on the peoples and the races and exploring their mythology.
While meanwhile focusing on character development, adding party members as the adventure progresses, having some back stabbing and killing characters that people have become emotionally attached to.
Thoughts? Questions? Concerns?
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Post by Mikauzoran on Apr 7, 2015 2:25:23 GMT
Here's the beginning as a sort of sneak peek:
They came on the eve of the summer solstice, four ships as black as the darkness in which they shrouded themselves. They dove out of the sky like just as many monstrous crows, descending swiftly on some tasty morsel spotted below. Tonight, that “morsel” was the Silver Citadel—the capital of the land of Glishveil—in the very center of the continent where King Claudius and his family resided. It was a splendid city, a sight to behold…but tonight it was in flames, its riches plundered as the marauders poured out of the flying ships like ants, converging on the peaceful town.
The invaders marched towards the castle, sacking and looting as they went. They easily and efficiently cut down the guards that had been dispatched to bring a stop to the siege. The foreign weapons riddled the soldiers with holes. The swords and shields and crossbows hadn’t stood a chance against guns.
A messenger brought word of the dire situation to the king, and King Claudius himself donned armor. He was nearly sixty years old, and it had been two decades since he had last wielded a sword. He knew he was going to discuss terms of surrender, but he stood tall and walked proud, his head held high and his expression set in firm determination. He wanted to put on a brave face lest any of his children see him. He was most likely going to his death, and he wanted them to remember him this way.
It was three in the morning when Prince Claudio was shaken from a very pleasant dream of ice cream sodas and a young waitress with an agreeable smile. His first thought was that the ice cream parlor was on fire. He remained groggy for another minute or so, and then he came to the realization that he was in his bedroom and that that bonfire smell mixed with the metallic scent of blood was coming from outside his window.
Prince Claudio stumbled out of bed and threw open the shutters, peering out at the Silver Citadel in abject horror.
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Post by Nikudou Natsumi on Apr 7, 2015 3:10:30 GMT
Sound interesting, Mikau! I want to read it already!
Hm, maybe the wind people shouldn't have their own land. Maybe they should just travel all over the place, like wind does. What do you think?
Ooh, I like it! I want to read more now . . . Question: how old is the prince?
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Post by Mikauzoran on Apr 7, 2015 3:16:50 GMT
Awesome! Thanks.
The only problem with the wind people traveling is that they have to stay in their own designated space to take care of the Guardian's temple. Unless the temple isn't stationary. Maybe I could elevate them and put them up in the sky. :/ I was kind of thinking of them as desert nomad people. Maybe. I need to take a shower over them. I mean--! ^.^; I think in the shower so that I can practice dialogue out loud to myself without having to bare the strange looks from my parents, so...I need to take a shower and think about them.
As for Prince Claudio...I'm thinking twenty to twenty-five. I want Mika to be a little younger than him, so maybe he's twenty-three, she's twenty.
*Wiggles in excitement* I'm going to have so much fun with her. I can use all of my hard work and time spent developing Sera on Mika. ^.^
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Post by Nikudou Natsumi on Apr 7, 2015 3:24:04 GMT
Hm. I like that expression, taking a shower over something XD It sounds like a good idea, too, and you can talk without whispering. I should try that sometime. Ah okay. Oh, and something else I didn't mention before: I like the stark contrast between an ice cream parlor and the capital burning/being attacked. Makes me feel sorry for Prince Claudio . . . Also, was Prince Claudio named after his father, King Claudius?
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Post by Mikauzoran on Apr 7, 2015 3:46:20 GMT
Yeah, I wanted to kick him out of his literally sweet dreams into a blazing inferno, so... Pity the poor dear. It gets worse.
Yes. We haven't gotten to the other siblings yet, but they're Claude, Claudia, Claudine, Claudio, and Claudette.
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Post by Nikudou Natsumi on Apr 7, 2015 12:13:01 GMT
*to Prince Claudio* ( T.T)\(-_- )
Oh my goodness, that's a lot of Clauds.
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Post by Mikauzoran on Apr 12, 2015 16:28:01 GMT
I'm super excited. My brother Japas and I sat down yesterday and talked about my novel idea, and was super helpful. Basically he asked a lot of questions and said, "Well, this is really weak." "This could be stronger." "Why don't you do this instead?" "Really think about the characters: What do they want? Why are they there? What's their purpose in the story?"
He also told me that my party didn't sound like a really strong bunch of characters because a lot of them were sort of aloof/loner types. He ha me rethink some things and combine two characters. He also gave me some good advice about developing one of them and making them a strong mascot character that people would like instead of just an annoyance. ^.^;
Anyway, I got a lot of great advice yesterday, so I'm really pumped to keep working on this. I'm about four thousand-ish words in. ^.^
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Windbritsle
Full Member
Part of the Dark as the Raven's Wing Anime/Manga FanFiction Group! In that group, I'm Robin!
Posts: 195
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Post by Windbritsle on Apr 12, 2015 17:18:27 GMT
Wind race... Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... HMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... How about a bunch a people with a king too young to rule right so his mother (EVIL) takes care of it? I know its a common theme... But about them, I seriously lack ideads... Maybe descedents of DA PHEONIX, with every family bloodline representing a bird species...? I REALLY DUNNO. JUST TRY NOT TO MAKE THEM ALL BADDIES OR I'LL BE VERY UPSET.
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Post by Nikudou Natsumi on Apr 12, 2015 20:00:01 GMT
Sounds like you're making good progress!
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