Post by kkrazy256 on Mar 22, 2015 13:11:34 GMT
FFnet format: link
Summary: In which Hakuba visits the Kuroba household after the Nightmare heist and discovers something he never wanted to see.
This is one of the few times that that I've wrriten from Hakuba's POV. I wonder if his characterization is alright. Although he's not really developed in the manga anyways.
There is a painful aura in Nakamori Ginzo's car that Hakuba just wanted to get away from.
Honestly, he was willing to just unbuckle his seatbelt and throw himself out of the passenger seat door and tumble into the streets. Tumble into the streets and just lay on the asphalt in a bubble of self-loathing and guilt.
Anything to get away from the sounds of Kenta's soft sobs in the backseats of the car.
He glanced at the front view mirror and immediately looked away when he saw the boy's shivering form buried in Aoko's equally trembling arms.
He gritted his teeth and refrained from making audible sounds. No one needed to hear his anger besides himself.
If only! He clenched his fists. If only he had been faster! If only he had gotten there earlier. If only he had been bloody smarter! He should've deduced Nightmare's identity quicker! He should've realized where Nightmare and Kid had gone. He should've-he should've-
"It's not your fault."
He flinched and glanced to the right in one flickering motion.
Nakamori kept his eyes on the road. His reassurance had only been a whisper, as if not to let Aoko and Kenta hear.
Hakuba blinked and observed the inspector's tight grip on the steering wheel, knuckles white, wrists shaking from clenching the handles so hard.
He feels the same...
Hakuba nodded meekly and turned back to staring out the window. The moon was high in the dark skies, slowly being obscured by black clouds.
Hiding the moon...hiding the truth.
They had spent nearly two hours at the police headquarters, accounting stories, filing reports, doing administrative things.
Watching a young boy lose everything in the span of one night.
It was far too late to contact the orphanage so the Superintendent (Of course he was involved, it was an Interpol agent that had died after all) had ordered Nakamori to take Kenta to his house for the night. Aoko had also been adamant on keeping Kenta in her arms so there had been no protest.
The car turned down a quiet neighborhood and came to a stop in front of a big house.
Hakuba mechanically unbuckled his seatbelt and stepped out, glancing at the home before him. Not as big as his own abode but relatively big in comparison to the rest of the houses in the neighborhood.
He watched Nakamori quietly stumble towards the backseat door and open it for the girl and the boy.
Aoko slipped out of the seat with Kenta in her arms. The young boy's frame was still racked with sobs that haven't stopped since they found-
Stop thinking about it, you git.
Usually, he would never be so affected by a death. He encountered them regularly. In real life and in his father's files. Death was nothing strange to him.
But this time, it was personal.
His anger and frustration returned twice as strong and he hissed.
He wanted to ask him. He wanted to reach down into hell and pull Jack Connery's twisted soul from the depths. He was going to have him in his grip and then he would ask:
Why would you do such a thing? Was it worth it? To leave Kenta all alone? Was it?
"Can...can he stay in my room? I-I don't want to leave him alone." He perked up at Aoko's soft voice and turned. The girl was hugging the crying boy and asking her father, staring at him with teary eyes.
"Of course, Aoko...of course." Came the inspector's hoarse reply. Aoko nodded and ushered the small boy into her home. Kenta's sobs slowly grew faint as they disappeared further into the house.
Hakuba sighed and ran a hand through his greasy hair. He needed to go home and fix himself up as well. It was a school night and he had barely gotten any sleep. He had literally dropped everything off the moment he had gotten home from France and ran for the heist.
Even then, he didn't make it in time.
As he turned his head, he paused when he noticed the house next door.
Kuroba.
The address plate proudly announced the name of the owner of the home.
f*****g hell.
While he wallowed in his own self-hatred, he had completely forgotten about Kid.
His stomachs twisted into knots as he imagined the scene that had happened between Nightmare and Kid.
The glove-oh dear god, Kuroba.
"Hakuba-kun?" He jumped and turned around with wide eyes.
"Are you alright?" Nakamori's concerned expression came into view when the Brit got himself to calm down and focus.
"Y-yes, I'm fine." He let out a shuddered breath.
"Do you want a ride home? You are welcomed to stay the night as well. It's been pretty..."
Fucked up.
"Yeah..." Hakuba agreed with the unspoken words and sighed again.
"It's fine, inspector. I can walk from here. My house isn't too far."
"It's goddamn three in the morni-"
"And you should stay...for Aoko-kun." Hakuba interrupted and watch Nakamori stop and swallow painfully loud.
"...Y-you're right...have...have a safe trip back then, Hakuba-kun. I'll tell Aoko you said goodbye."
Hakuba nodded and gave a small, tired smile. He waved until Nakamori shut the front door, leaving the streets dark and lonely.
He found himself pushing the gate to the Kuroba household open and walking stiffly down the pathway.
His eyes fell to stare at the ground.
Gravel was trudged up from its place in the soil; dirt was strewn around in messy streaks, forming the pattern of footprints. Footprints that showed an irregular gait as if the owner had been stumbling.
He gulped and continued walking, careful to avoid getting his shoes muddy.
He froze at the open doorway.
Open. Unlocked. Strange. Abnormal.
Alarming.
He stepped in, looking around cautiously. The halls were dark and quiet.
"Kuroba….kun?" He didn't dare raise his voice.
There was no answer. Not even a thump sounded in the dark home.
This caused him to snap back into focus. He had no time to dilly dally.
Focus. You're a detective, for crying out loud. Stay calm, Saguru.
He took a deep breath and slipped off his shoes. There were no other shoes at the foyer but Hakuba does notice the muddy footprints continuing further into the house.
He followed the dirty tracks to the staircase and looked up. It was dead silent.
He began to climb, wincing when the first floorboard creaked. When he reached the top, sweat was running down his neck. How has Kuroba still not notice him? Those stairs were a hazard to stealth.
He didn't care for covert movements anymore. His pace quickened as he walked down the long halls of the second floor, pushing doors open with a panicked urgency.
"Kuroba-kun?"
Not here.
"Kuroba-kun? Where are you?"
Not here either.
"God damn it Kuroba…" He hissed as he opened the door to another guest room.
He turned the corner leading to the last few rooms of the floor and paused when he heard a noise. He strained his ears to listen.
Muttering?
He inched closer to the semi-closed door, the noise growing stronger. His stomach dropped when it finally registered in his head as Kuroba's voice.
A shaky, hysterical version of Kuroba's voice.
He pushed the door open slowly and peered in.
"Kuroba-kun?" He whispered and took a few steps in. The room was dark; the balcony door was ajar, making the curtains billow serenely. In the moonlight, he saw a huddled form near the corner besides the bed.
Kuroba.
"Kuroba-kun?" Hakuba's breath caught in his throat when as he stalked to the other side of the room.
It was Kid.
The top hat was gone (it was on the bed). But the suit and cape couldn't be mistaken for any other.
It was Kid.
A repulsive thought flashed through his mind before it disappeared as quickly as it appeared. He had finally gotten solid evidence that Kuroba Kaito was Kid. He could yell across the balcony for Nakamori-keibu to come across and catch the Kid. He was in no state to run away. He was trapped and Hakuba was here to see it all.
He was disgusted at himself for even imagining such a thing.
He knew he couldn't do it.
Not when Kid-not when Kuroba looked like this.
"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry"
He could finally make out the mumbled mantra Kuroba was spewing in a quick, quiet voice. It wasn't Kid's smooth, charming voice nor was it Kuroba's cheeky, happy one either.
He had never heard Kuroba sound like this.
He was shaking, even worse than Kenta had been. The sweat on his forehead glistened in the moonlight, highlighting the thief's sickly pale pallor. Kuroba had his ungloved right hand in a death grip-Hakuba could see the blood dripping from the trembling wrist where his left hand had dug deep into. His violet eyes were staring at nothing as he continued to apologize to nothing yet everything. The monocle was gone.
How long has he been sitting here in this state?
"Kuroba, stop it you're hurting yourself-"He made a grab at the thief's hand.
There was a split second of absolute silence before all hell broke loose.
"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Kuroba screeched and lost it. He yanked at his arm-letting out a hiss of pain, and kicked at Hakuba's torso as he tried to scramble away.
"f**k- I'm sorry Kuroba-"Hakuba groaned when the thief landed a rather hard kick to his stomach. He released his wrist immediately- cursing himself for his stupidity. Touching someone in that state would only exacerbate things.
"Don't touch me don't touch me don't touch me"
Hakuba ran a hand through his hair, breathing heavily. What should he do? What should he do?
"Please, Kuroba calm down. I'm sorry, I didn't know. Please.-"He pleaded, overwhelmed by the sudden turn of events. He didn't like this; he didn't know how to deal with this. Help me…someone help me calm him down.
"Don't touch me don't touch me let go let go! Dad's still in there I have to help him. He's burning he's in pain he's going to die. Let me go! Dad I'm sorry I'm sorry I tried I tried I really did. But I couldn't-I wasn't-I wanted-I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry"
The detective stopped his inner panic to look at Kuroba in horror. The thief was staring towards a distance, tears streaming down his face and Hakuba followed his gaze.
The portrait of Kuroba Toichi stared back.
No…Kuroba…oh god I'm so sorry.
He moved to blocked the portrait from Kuroba's view.
"No stop I need to save dad, out of the way! Dad!" His voice pitched up an octave as he grew hysterical over losing sight of his father's portrait. He scrambled to his knees, attempting to get around the detective.
"Kuroba, snap out of it damn it!" He wrapped his arms around the thief, keeping him in place. The struggling increased tenfold as Kuroba's continued to scream at him to let go.
"Please Kuroba stop please." He clenched his eyes shut and tightened his grip. This was wrong and he knew it. This wasn't how you calm someone down from having panic attack. But god he just wanted this to stop.
His grip slackened when he heard a whimper of pain escape the thief's lips. Seeing that Kuroba had weakened, he let go of him and surveyed him all over.
"Kuroba?"
"….Huh?" His reply was soft and so helplessly tired.
"Who am I?"
"H-hakuba…"
"Where are you?"
"….Home."
"Do you hurt?"
"Y-yeah"
"Where?"
The thief paused to grip at his right shoulder with a wince. Hakuba finally noticed the irregular position of the arm.
Hakuba took this moment to reach forward, hands hovering over Kuroba's shoulder. When the thief didn't seem like he was going to panic, he grabbed the arm gently and shifted it slightly.
"Ah-!" Kuroba flinched and his breath hitched again, growing erratic.
"Shh shh it's okay, it's just dislocated. Easy fix, don't worry." He spoke as if he were speaking to a child. Dislocated…most likely from-the glove
Don't think about it, Saguru.
"Hurts…"
"I know, Kuroba. Can you let me help you?"
"…'kay." He was put off by Kuroba's sudden compliance. His eyes were glassy and his breathing was shallow. He's going into shock…shit.
He quickly maneuvered Kuroba onto his back, shoving a pilllow under his legs. He held the injured arm up with caution.
"Ne, Kuroba what's your favorite food?" He bent the arm at the elbow slowly, allowing quick glances back at the thief's dazed expression.
"…Chocolate…ice cream"
"I think strawberry is better." He hummed as he rotated the arm outwardly in a steady fashion.
"You' stupid. Chocolate better." Kuroba gave a soft giggle and Hakuba felt inclined to laugh as well.
"What about your doves?"
"They're cute, love 'em all."
"There are so many." He finally felt taut resistance and swallowed, giving Kuroba a quick smile.
"I know 'em all by their names." The thief huffed and opened his mouth to recite all their names.
"I believe you, Kuroba." He took this moment to rotate the thief's arm inwardly and was glad to hear the satisfying pop as the humeral head slipped back into place.
"Ngh-!" Kuroba cried with a sharp inhale and curled in on himself at the sudden pain.
"It's okay, Kuroba it's done. Your arm's back in place." He assured and stopped short of touching the thief. He watched Kuroba attempt to regain his composure, letting out quick breaths.
"….Thanks." Kuroba whispered after a moment passed in silence.
"E-eh? Ah no it's-"Hakuba coughed and looked away. Why was he being thanked? He was only doing what any decent human being would do-
You thought about turning him in, didn't you?
He bit his lip and stopped speaking.
"…Well…you won."
"…W-what?" Hakuba stammered.
Kuroba looked up at him with a tired smile. The traces of tears on his face were beginning to dry, leaving him looking utterly exhausted.
"You're in my house, I'm wearing the suit. Do the math, detective. You have the greatest evidence in your hands. I can't lie my way out of this one." He let out a breathless laugh and relaxed back on the ground. "I don't think I ever want to get up again..." He mumbled.
"Don't mock me." Hakuba narrowed his eyes and growled. Kuroba turned to give him a half-interested stare.
"What?"
"How the bloody hell do you expect me to turn you in after what happened?" He hissed and glared at the stupid thief. The latter blinked before returning the glower.
"Why not? I thought stealing would be enough to throw me into jail. Or do I need to remind you that I killed a man today?" His voice trembled as he finished the sentence, his lips quivering.
Hakuba' eyes widened before he sputtered.
"W-wha- you did not kill him, Kuroba! It was inevitable-"
"I could've saved him!" The thief shot up abruptly, barely wincing at the dull pain in his shoulder.
"You couldn't have! He was beyond saving at tha-"
"I was anchored on! I was lying down, I had leverage! I was holding on to him! I dropped him, Hakuba! I killed him!" His breaths came out ragged as he yelled.
"Kuroba…that man was twice your size. There was no way you could've held him up long enough for help to come."
Kuroba was faltering as he swayed, staring at his shaky right hand.
"N-no, I had him. I-I was holding on to him. I could've-I could've-" He paused and pressed a hand against his mouth, looking nauseous. Hakuba swiftly moved to steady the thief.
"You did try…with all you had. Your dislocated shoulder is proof of that, isn't it?" He rubbed small circles on the smaller male's back in a gentle motion. Kuroba shook his head.
"N-no, I killed-I killed hi-"
"Listen to me Kuroba!" Hakuba spoke loudly, causing the thief to wince and look at him.
"You did not kill Jack Connery, Kuroba. Look at me and repeat after me. You tried to save him."
"I-I tried.."
"You tried to save Connery."
"I tried to save…to save Connery-san…"
"Yes, you did Kuroba." Hakuba sighed and ruffled the thief's hair absentmindedly.
A few minutes passed in silence as they sat together under the moonlit sky.
"Sorry about your shirt." Kuroba mumbled and Hakuba blinked before looking down. There was a muddy footprint right smack on the center of his coat.
"Ah…it's alright. I'll get it dry-cleaned." He waved a hand dismissively. Kuroba gave him a sheepish grin and started to remove his dirty white shoes.
"What's going to happen to Kenta-kun?" Kuroba whispered, staring at the floor with heavy eyes.
The detective thought back to the young boy's sobs and looked away as well.
"He's most likely going to return to the orphanage tomorrow. Hopefully, he will be adopted by some family soon."
"Yeah…a family with a mom, a dad…so he can spend time with them…and have fun. Go on trips, have dinner together, watch movies…" Kuroba trailed off with a sad-longing?- smile and Hakuba chuckled as well.
"Yeah…that'd be nice…Aoko-kun has grown attached to him though."
He watched the thief stiffen and turn to look at him with large, fearful eyes.
"Y-you don't think she would…" His expression told the story. He would break down completely if that were to happen.
"No, I don't think Aoko-kun would adopt Kenta-kun. It's much too big of a responsibility. Nakamori-keibu would be at work most of the time and Aoko-kun would be at school. It is not an ideal place for Kenta-kun to be in." Hakuba reasoned.
"Y-you're probably right…there's no way…right?" Kuroba reassured himself quietly as he hugged his knees to his chest.
"….What about Kenta-kun's surgery?" The thief mumbled, resting his forehead against his knees.
"We did the administrative things at the headquarters. With Jack Connery's death…the insurance money…it...it would be enough to pay for his surgery."
There was a solemn pause as they both digested the facts. The surgery could be done. The surgery Nightmare stole and killed for. Now his son could get that surgery. At the cost of his own life.
Was it worth it?
"I thought I could've changed his mind."
Hakuba raised an eyebrow, prompting the thief to go on.
"I was going to tell him, 'stop stealing, spend some more time with Kenta-kun. Don't regret it when it's too late.'. But…I-I couldn't, Hakuba. This Nightmare thing….this obsession…it ate him. His mission consumed him. There was no way he would've stopped." He was trembling as he spoke.
"…So in the end, Nightmare was lured in by his own trap…" Hakuba whispered and Kuroba curled in on himself even further.
Hakuba glanced at the clock.
4:07
He sighed and ran a hand through his hair again. He supposed skipping out on school wasn't such a bad idea.
"Kuroba, how do you feel?"
"Dizzy, tired, like crap." Came the snarky reply.
"You might still be in shock. Come on." Hakuba stood, feeling lightheaded himself at the sudden change. He helped the confused thief to his feet.
"H-hakuba?"
He guided Kuroba to the bed besides them and gently pushed him onto it, carefully keeping his right shoulder safe from any more injury.
"It's four in the morning. You're in no condition to stay up. Go to sleep." He sighed again and shrugged his dirt-covered jacket off before lying down besides the thief.
"H-Hakuba?" Kuroba squeaked again at the detective's sudden forwardness.
"What?" The Brit groaned, rubbing his exhausted eyes, giving the thief a veiled glare.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"Making sure you don't injure your arm, idiot. We're going to get you a sling for that tomorrow. But right now, sleep in the best medicine."
He closed his eyes and let his mind drift. He could still feel the thief's eyes boring into his forehead.
"I'm not turning you in."
"…You're not?"
"No. You were…compromised tonight. I am a British gentleman with honor. It's not a fair fight unless I catch you in action, right?"
"Dork." He smiled when he heard the harmless jab.
"But thanks….really. For helping me with my arm and for…for…"
For staying.
"It's fine, Kuroba." Hakuba reached out and ruffled the thief's signature messy hair. If he could help Kid chase away his nightmares...perhaps...he could let go of his own as well.
"That's what friends are for, right?"
Shining violet eyes stare back into his brown ones.
"Yeah….we're friends." Kuroba smiled, closing his eyes.
"'Night Hakuba."
"….Good night….Kuroba."